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Sex Without Pain: A Self-Treatment Guide To The Sex Life You Deserve was written by Heather Jeffcoat, DPT, a physical therapist with countless successes in treating pain of this type. Women with vaginismus, overactive pelvic floor, painful intercourse, vulvodynia, vulvar vestibulitis, vestibulodynia, dyspareunia, interstitial cystitis have all benefited from her unique program. Heather uses her orthopaedic background to approach treatment of these muscles like they are....muscles! She utilizes a self-treatment tool called a dilator to provide massage and other muscle relaxation and stretching techniques in a gentle fashion to return a women's muscles back to a resting, rather than guarded, state.

Sex Without Pain: A Self-Treatment Guide To The Sex Life You Deserve

What Others are Saying About "Sex Without Pain ":

I have seen Heather's treatment program work time and time again with my patients. Her unique approach to treating women with painful intercourse through a combination of hands on skills, patient education and the thorough home program outlined in this book has surpassed the results of her peers. Her techniques and expertise have been an invaluable resource to my practice."

- Kerri Parks, MD (Associate Professor Ob/Gyn USC Keck School of Medicine)


I will use it frequently for clients who cannot afford pelvic floor PT or for those who cannot find pelvic floor PT any where near them! I have so needed this resource. The clarity of each step and the drawings are so helpful - I don't know of any other resource that will be as effective for self-help."

- Joyce Penner, RN, MN (Sexual Therapist, Educator and Co-author of The Gift of Sex, Restoring the Pleasure and numerous other publications)


Sex Without Pain is an essential book for any woman suffering with pelvic or sexual pain. Heather's approach is simple and clear. She empowers the woman and her partner with the resources needed to lead a healthy and pain free sex life. A great read for patients and professionals alike."

- Jennifer Briggs, DPT (Women's Health Physical Therapist, Pennsylvania)


• To order "Sex Without Pain" in paperback from Amazon for $24.99, click here.

• To order an electronic read-only non-printable PDF copy of the book for instant download at $19.99, use the button below:

• To schedule an appointment at one of the Femina PT offices, click here.

• For a list of other trusted health care providers, click here.

right type of lube

Looking for the right type of lube for whichever kind of sex you're having?

Joseph Lamour writing for Mic.com reached out to me for my input on the right type of lube for various types of sex, and I was glad to offer my advice. Here is a brief synopsis of the article, along with a link to the full article below.

Heather Jeffcoat, DPT

I believe it was Colin Powell who said, “Trust is the glue that holds people together, and is the lubricant that keeps an organization moving forward.” I’m certain he was not talking about the gooey stuff you get in the unmentionables aisle in your local drugstore. But I still think the impassioned statement works when we’re talking about sex — which also holds people together, if you will, moving forward toward a goal. Lube really does keep us moving forward, and it’s a super underrated bedroom accoutrement, mostly because people aren’t aware of its versatility.


Just what is the right type of lube?

Any lubricant — natural or not — has the potential to irritate your tissue, so always apply a few drops on your forearm to make sure there is no immediate sensitivity,"

says Heather Jeffcoat, a doctor of physical therapy that specializes in treating women, men, and non-binary folks with painful sex. She talks about the right type of lube every day with patients, and she even wrote a book on achieving pleasurable sex for those who find it more challenging — so she truly knows her stuff.

If you do have trouble getting wet for any reason, or your vaginal lubrication doesn’t last very long, Jeffcoat also suggests a thick, gel-like water-based lubricant like Slippery Stuff or Uber Lube.

Anal Sex

Everyone has a butt. Thus, everyone has the capability to partake in a bit of peach entry from time to time (or all the time, if you’re lucky). “Any lubricant that be used vaginally should be able to be used with anal sexual activity as well, and without the concern for a certain pH,” Eilber says, adding that it’s important to remember that the anal canal does not produce natural lubricant, so frequent reapplication may be necessary.

Of the many experts I spoke to, all suggested the same thing: a silicone-based lube — and I concur. “Lubrication for anal penetration needs to be longer lasting since it doesn’t lubricate like vaginal tissue. Pjur’s Back Door, which is silicone-based, works well for this,” she tells me.

It’s also important to note that certain kinds of toys warrant the right type of lube — silicone lubes should not be used with silicone toys, Eilber tells me. A suggestion for people who are using their fingers, thicker is also the way to go.

Using a thicker gel for digital play is nice, so you can get the lubricant where you want it. Lubricants that are too liquid tend to go everywhere you don’t want it to,” Jeffcoat says.

If you are still curious about the right type of lube for the sex you are having, continue to the full article here.

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What Our Patients Have to Say

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Testimonial by J.B.

My husband and I were having problems with painful intercourse. My therapist recommended that I go and get a pelvic floor evaluation from a physical therapist. Having never been treated by a physical therapist, I wondered how this really was going to help me. My husband who is a physician was very supportive and agreed that a PT evaluation would be a great idea. So i made the appointment and was blown away by what I learned. I had no idea that pelvic floor muscles could get tight and have trigger points just like any other muscle in the body. I'm a massage therapist and very familiar with tight muscles, and this new thought really amazed me. Heather's program to help relax and strengthen these muscles made such a difference. I can say that I am 100% pain free during intercourse now. Yippee! Going to the PT appointments and doing the at-home exercises was definitely a discipline, but it's 100% worth it! The rewards are amazing.

-- J.B.

Testimonial by Fritzette H.

I went to Heather after the birth of my third child. It was lucky, really, that I was referred to her, because my doctor had referred me to a surgeon for a possible hysterectomy or pelvic wall rebuild. Thankfully, I went to Heather before undergoing either surgery, she was able to fix the problem. She has studied extensively in women's health--even written a book about it--and was able to diagnose my problem, suggest a course of treatment (6 weeks), and then follow through with said treatment. By the end, as she said, I was as good as gold. Boy, was it worth it! Though uncomfortable to talk about, much less write about, it is worth getting the word out there. If you have painful intercourse, especially after birth or other trauma, the treatment may be as simple as Physical Therapy (with Heather, of course). I highly recommend her.

-- Fritzette H., 3/24/16 via Yelp!

Testimonial by R.H.

No one could tell me why I was having pain during sex--sharp pain, not just uncomfortable, pain. I was referred to Heather Jeffcoat after researching several different options. I had seen a specialist who told me physical therapy would not help and my only option was surgery. I really didn't want to go that route, so when we got a referral, I decided to try it--it can't hurt, I thought. I am so glad I did. She diagnosed the problem right away, which was a relief in itself.

To know why I was having pain eased my mind immensely. And to hear that she could fix it without surgery was another relief. She said she could fix the problem in 6 weeks. I think it was actually 4 for me. She was very methodical, and treated me as an intelligent human being capable of participating in my own recovery. I would absolutely recommend her to anyone. She did not try to prolong my session numbers, she worked hard to accommodate my schedule (and the fact that I had to bring a baby to sessions), and she was completely honest the entire time. It is so hard to find someone with these characteristics, much less a professional who is so good at what she does. She has my highest respect.

-- R.H.

Testimonial by T.H.

I started seeing Heather in October 2014. For more than two years, I had been suffering from painful urinary tract infection type symptoms after my bartholins gland surgery which included constant burning and urinary frequency sensation that led to more and more painful intercourse. I had made multiple visits to internist, obgyn and urologist's offices, went through a range of treatment with UTI and bladder frequency medication that included antibiotics, vesicare, estrogen cream, but nothing worked.

Read more: Testimonial by T.H.

Testimonial by Jamie M.

I have been going to see Heather for a while now, and I can't tell you enough how much she has improved my quality of life. Heather specializes in issues like pelvic floor, but I see her for other orthopedic issues.

I have a lot of chronic joint pain and dysfunction issues (back, hips, neck) that require that have ongoing physical therapy maintenance. The effects of my problem joints/areas overlap and interconnect with each other in complex ways, so helping me requires really having a complete understanding of the entire skeletal and muscular system. Pain does not always appear where the problem actually is, the human body is a twisty, many-layered puzzle. I have an exercise program I do at home and I am very functional, but there are just something things I need a PT to help me out with.

Read more: Testimonial by Jamie M.

Testimonial by M.M.

A personal journey and testimonial from one of my patients:

My husband and I were married for 5 years before we were able to have intercourse due to my vaginismus. There was nothing traumatic in my past but for some reason, even though I wanted sex, I mentally avoided "that area" of my body and didn't even admit to myself that there was a problem for a long time, even though I was never able to put tampons in. Once I finally opened my eyes up to the fact that I had a problem, I had a surgery that was supposed to fix the issue.

Read more: Testimonial by M.M.

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