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woman in bed needing vaginal dilators
Photo: Getty Images/Sarayuth Punnasuriyaporn-EyeEm
Gabrielle Kassel of the website Well + Good reached out to me for my expertise on the proper use of vaginal dilators for overcoming vaginal tightness, pain during sex or tampon insertion, etc., and I was glad to add my two cents on this vastly important topic for many women. Here is a brief synopsis of the article along with a link to the full article below.

Heather Jeffcoat, DPT

Unless you have a medical kink or are role-playing nurse and patient, the doctor’s office and bedroom probably function as separate, non-interacting entities. But for some people who experience pelvic or sexual pain, vaginal dilators blend the experience of the two.

Below, two pelvic-floor therapists explain the purpose of these medical tools, as well as how to determine if they may be useful for your personal pelvic-floor issues or sexual pain.

What are vaginal dilators and how do you use them?

Aesthetically, vaginal dilators are akin to dildos, but their intended use is as medical devices to gradually stretch, relax, massage, or mobilize the pelvic-floor muscles.

Designed to enter and stay in the vagina for a prescribed duration of time (usually five to 20 minutes)—or manipulated to massage the internal vaginal walls—vaginal dilators are sold in kits of three to seven total dilators of increasing size, says Heather Jeffcoat, DPT, a doctor of physical therapy who specializes in sexual dysfunction and incontinence, and is the author of "Sex Without Pain".

The intention is for you to start with whatever size you can insert comfortably. Then, after a few days, weeks, or months, when your vaginal canal has learned to relax around and accommodate its size without pain, you size up. This progression continues until you reach your end-goal girth and length. Some folks have the goal of being able to comfortably have penetrative intercourse with their partner’s penis, and thus will work up to a dilator of a similar size. Others wish to use a regular-size tampon comfortably, and thus will work up to a dilator of similar size to that.

When using dilators, patience is key.

You have to respect the time your body is asking for to work up in size and through the kit,” says Dr. Jeffcoat.

Who are vaginal dilators for, exactly?

The short answer: Vaginal dilators are for anyone who has been to a pelvic-floor therapist who has recommended the use of the tool, says Dr. Ossai. And according to Dr. Jeffcoat, this may include anyone who experiences pelvic or penetrative pain, including folks with endometriosis, vulvodynia or vestibulodynia (pain around vaginal opening), vaginismus (constricted vaginal muscles), hypertonic pelvic floor (non-relaxing pelvic-floor muscles), painful bladder syndrome, and genitourinary syndrome of menopause (genital atrophy).

Vaginal dilators may also be used by people who have had pelvic-floor surgery, radiation for abdominal or pelvic cancer, or vaginoplasty to promote pelvic-floor health,” she says.

Click here for the full article containing more info on the use of vaginal dilators.

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What Our Patients Have to Say

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Testimonial by S.P., Age 26

I would like to start off by thanking Heather Jeffcoat for educating me and curing me of Vaginismus. I had been married for almost three years before I was referred to Heather. I never knew about Vaginismus until almost three years into my marriage. I knew something was wrong when I went on my honeymoon and came back a Virgin. I had always imagined how magical my first night would be but boy was I wrong.

Read more: Testimonial by S.P., Age 26

Testimonial by S.P., Age 26

I would like to start off by thanking Heather Jeffcoat for educating me and curing me of Vaginismus. I had been married for almost three years before I was referred to Heather. I never knew about Vaginismus until almost three years into my marriage. I knew something was wrong when I went on my honeymoon and came back a Virgin. I had always imagined how magical my first night would be but boy was I wrong.

Read more: Testimonial by S.P., Age 26

Testimonial by Jamie M.

I have been going to see Heather for a while now, and I can't tell you enough how much she has improved my quality of life. Heather specializes in issues like pelvic floor, but I see her for other orthopedic issues.

I have a lot of chronic joint pain and dysfunction issues (back, hips, neck) that require that have ongoing physical therapy maintenance. The effects of my problem joints/areas overlap and interconnect with each other in complex ways, so helping me requires really having a complete understanding of the entire skeletal and muscular system. Pain does not always appear where the problem actually is, the human body is a twisty, many-layered puzzle. I have an exercise program I do at home and I am very functional, but there are just something things I need a PT to help me out with.

Read more: Testimonial by Jamie M.

Testimonial by A.B.

Before I was referred to Heather Jeffcoat I was living in a nightmare. I had been married to my husband for three years and I was suffering from Vaginismus. That all changed when I visited my OBGYN and she said she knew of someone with a great success rate. To be honest I was hesitant at first because my first doctor had already told me that all I needed to do was order dilators from the internet and I should overcome my problem. She was wrong because I had followed the book on how to use the dilators with absolutely no advancements in my condition. However, that all changed when I went in for my first visit and Heather took the time to explain my condition and how we were going to work together to overcome it.

I remember leaving her office with a glimmer of hope that I could live a normal life. As my sessions continued I began to see immediate results. With only four sessions and a strict dedication to my home programs I was cured of Vaginismus. In the beginning of this process I was made aware that my health insurance company might not cover the costs, which was disappointing but today I can say one hundred percent that it was the best money I ever spent. Now thanks to Heather I am finally enjoying my life to the fullest with my husband. Thank you Heather, I can’t begin to tell you how much I appreciate all that you have done for me. I will never forget it. Those who are suffering from these types of conditions don’t be afraid because she makes you feel so comfortable and the end result is worth it. Good luck to you all and I hope you experience the success I have.
-- A.B.

Testimonial by M.M.

A personal journey and testimonial from one of my patients:

My husband and I were married for 5 years before we were able to have intercourse due to my vaginismus. There was nothing traumatic in my past but for some reason, even though I wanted sex, I mentally avoided "that area" of my body and didn't even admit to myself that there was a problem for a long time, even though I was never able to put tampons in. Once I finally opened my eyes up to the fact that I had a problem, I had a surgery that was supposed to fix the issue.

Read more: Testimonial by M.M.

Testimonial by Amanda W.

Heather's unique physical therapy program literally changed my life! After years of struggling with vaginismus, a condition that made it impossible for me to have intercourse and very difficult to use tampons without pain, a gynecologist referred me to Heather. I was nervous for my first appointment, but Heather's professional and friendly demeanor put me at ease. She did a great job explaining each technique she was using to help my muscles relax. Heather uses a combination of internal and external stretches and exercises to relax the pelvic floor and build muscle strength. Her specially developed home program helped me quickly recover from an issue that seemed insurmountable before meeting Heather. She was optimistic about my progress and incredibly encouraging. Less than 6 months after my first session, I was able to have pain-free sex for the first time in my life! If you are suffering from vaginismus or any other pelvic floor issues, I highly recommend making an appointment with Heather and reading her book!

-- Amanda W., 2/15/16 via Yelp!

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